How To Survive Las Vegas On The Cheap!

My last trip to Las Vegas was for charity, so I decided not to bring enough money for gambling, and just hang out. In the end, I didn’t even bring enough money for food, but I still had a blast. Welcome to the easiest way to survive without a lot of money in Las Vegas.

1. Stay at the Terribles Hotel and Casino.
   The exotic dancers in Vegas don’t even go here to hang out, it is more of a dishwashers and drunks type of place. As seedy as it is, the rooms are $69 bucks a night (with a $26 Sunday room). Beers are $2.50 at the bar, its one mile from the strip and you don’t have to worry about being harassed by “ladies of the night”. (A lot of pilots stay here.)
2. The secret to drinking for free in Vegas.
   Ever heard of penny slots? (Slot machines where the minimum bet is one cent). This is brainless, you go with a couple buddies and don’t want to spend $100 to get into TAO and $15-$25 a drink once you’re there. All you need to do is sit at the penny slots with about $3 each, play a few rounds and when the waitress comps you a drink, stop playing and wait while you hang out and drink. If she comes back through before your done hit the button again. Spin every once in a while to be safe, sit there and get hammered, then go walk the town.

   

3. Don’t take a taxi.
   It isn’t that far of a walk from any of the cheaper hotels to the strip. Bring a good pair of sneakers and hoof it, you prob could use a break from sitting on your butt anyway. Taxi’s in Vegas are billed on time, not mileage. A one mile ride can cost you $16 if you hit every light, or there is bad traffic. (There is only one time a taxi is free, when you are going to a gentleman’s club. With $30-$50 cover charges, you wont be going there if you’re broke.) Don’t forget, you’re hotel has an airport shuttle that doesn’t cost you a dime to get to and from McCarran International.
4. Hijack the buffet.
   There is no cheaper way to eat than a Vegas buffet. On my most recent trip, the Terribles buffet was $7.99 for breakfast, $9.99 for lunch, and $11.99 for the “shrimp and prime rib” dinner. Take whatever you can carry with you when you leave, especially if it has natural containers, or isn’t sloppy. (Bananas, apples, donuts, pastries,  hard boiled eggs, single serving boxes of cereal, etc.) If you can pull it off, load up a to go container with a final buffet trip right before leaving.
5. Don’t go to a gentleman’s club!
   If you must see a hard body in a bikini stop by the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino, pole dancers are just part of the bar area. The beer is a little more expensive, but you could have 3-6 beers for the price of the cover charge at the “other” club. If you must see this type of entertainment, I have a secret that can help you out (ask me).
6. Ellis Island Casino & Brewery.
   Another seedy local hangout about one block from the strip across from the Bellagio. The bartenders are nice, and they still have gaming. (Stop gambling you addict!) Why Ellis Island? Free karaoke, and 20oz exotic pints that cost… wait for it… $1.50.
7. If you smoke, never buy cigarettes in a casino.
   Smokes can cost $10-$14 in a casino. One mile off the strip at a gas station or liquor store they are $4-$5. Get off your butt and take a walk.
8. Diablo Cantina.
   You have to have one great meal while your in Las Vegas, make it here. The food is spectacular, and not much more expensive than your average TGIFriday’s. Every 30 minutes during happy hour, the bartender has a customer of his choice spin a big wheel that lands on a new drink special.
9. Make friends with a local.
   I wouldn’t advise buddying up with a taxi driver, a drunk, drug dealer, or someone passing out prostitute ads. Maybe the guy or girl working the desk at your hotel or a Starbucks. The Vegas working class are usually very kind, hard working individuals and if you have the right personality, are more than happy to show you around in exchange for a few drinks. Remember, these are people that work for a living and cant afford to do TAO either.
10. Afraid of the pool at your cheaper than life hotel?
    You can always poach time at a big casino, how are they going to know if you just walk in with sandals on and a towel over your shoulder?

    

11. Go see the only free show in Vegas.
    The Pirate Show at Treasure Island. The Pirate Show takes place outside of the casino, just feet from the sidewalk. All you have to do to enjoy the beauty of this show is sit there, watch and listen.

    

If you have more tips on doing Las Vegas cheap, or have questions… don’t be afraid to drop me a line.

Images  © James H. Pickett
Do not use without permission.

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